12th Aug 08
"So you finally told him tht u wont continue doing this CR thing??"
"yeah..he didnt agree though"
"now what??"
"i dont care...its over from my side."
Richa had observed me all these days..worked up, tensed and she saw me today...satisfaction on my face...she simply grinned.
We went to Khushbu's place tht same day and while returning back it started raining.
The rain lashing violently...i couldnt see who or what came in front of me..i just went on driving...getting wet, forgetting that i had a sore throat..i drove on and on..
I had my raincoat but then didnt feel a bit like wearing it...i wanted the rain to soak me...i felt free...free from all the hassles, the invisible chains tht had kept me bound fell off and there i was like a carefree bird..soaring high in the skies...following my heart.
Rules no longer mattered!
Saturday, 16 August 2008
Saturday, 9 August 2008
This isnt insomnia??
Lately i've been losing a lot of sleep over my studies(ha..ha).
The mind seems to enjoy working overtime these days(i somehow dont find the work it does acceptable)i wouldnt mind if my mind did something creative but cramming up wordlists and doing math problems isnt actually my cup of tea/coffee..whatever!
sadly i dont have many options(..read any??)
the actual problem is tht i havnt been able to stick to one thing(very fickle)..as i pick up my PSM book, i think of chest physio...but as soon as i complete a part of the breathing exercises...i hear my barron's calling me(damn)...
this is just the tip of the iceberg.
i've never ever shirked my responsiblities and have been equally aware of my duties.
being the class representative for the past two years i have been too obedient, too polite, too respectful. but c'mon everyone needs a break.
these days i've been caring less about those around me, losing my patience, my sanity and last but not the least my precious sleep!!
i even gave up writing poetry..no feelings, no emotions, no words!!
well, the thought process doesnt stop..so i've all the solutions at hand..
will be quitting the post i held for 2 years[..i must mention tht long time ago i did enjoy it..cant deny its perks :)]now's the time to hand over the ship to sumbody else and be one of the crew.happy sailing:)
i'll try concentrating on my course books as the dreadful exams are looming large. come sept. the faculty would be ready to pounce on us poor souls.
and finally abt handling the main exam..i believe i can manage that too.
hopefully with less burden on my shoulders all my tensions will come to an end,
i'd stop worrying unnecessarily and life wud be better again[life already seems a bit better..i penned down a poem recently:):)]
umm..so everything's sorted out..good.
one last question...will all the above let me take a good night sleep or will i continue suffering from what u call insomnia???
p.s - insomnia: a condition of being unable to sleep.
i guess i desperately need a few soporific lectures..(sighs)
The mind seems to enjoy working overtime these days(i somehow dont find the work it does acceptable)i wouldnt mind if my mind did something creative but cramming up wordlists and doing math problems isnt actually my cup of tea/coffee..whatever!
sadly i dont have many options(..read any??)
the actual problem is tht i havnt been able to stick to one thing(very fickle)..as i pick up my PSM book, i think of chest physio...but as soon as i complete a part of the breathing exercises...i hear my barron's calling me(damn)...
this is just the tip of the iceberg.
i've never ever shirked my responsiblities and have been equally aware of my duties.
being the class representative for the past two years i have been too obedient, too polite, too respectful. but c'mon everyone needs a break.
these days i've been caring less about those around me, losing my patience, my sanity and last but not the least my precious sleep!!
i even gave up writing poetry..no feelings, no emotions, no words!!
well, the thought process doesnt stop..so i've all the solutions at hand..
will be quitting the post i held for 2 years[..i must mention tht long time ago i did enjoy it..cant deny its perks :)]now's the time to hand over the ship to sumbody else and be one of the crew.happy sailing:)
i'll try concentrating on my course books as the dreadful exams are looming large. come sept. the faculty would be ready to pounce on us poor souls.
and finally abt handling the main exam..i believe i can manage that too.
hopefully with less burden on my shoulders all my tensions will come to an end,
i'd stop worrying unnecessarily and life wud be better again[life already seems a bit better..i penned down a poem recently:):)]
umm..so everything's sorted out..good.
one last question...will all the above let me take a good night sleep or will i continue suffering from what u call insomnia???
p.s - insomnia: a condition of being unable to sleep.
i guess i desperately need a few soporific lectures..(sighs)
Friday, 8 August 2008
All's well now!!!
HEADLINE: THE MIND IS GRACIOUS IN DEFEAT!!!
:) :) :)
Peering through the window
I see 'you',waving goodbye
A pall of gloom descends as you disappear!
Life continues at the same pace even as
the heart stays bereft of emotions...
My mirror eyes me solemnly
And I tend to look away, still sad,
unwilling to accept the unwarranted lack of cheer!
Dreams are offering me company
while hope doesnt allow me any solitude...
Then this sudden downpour from nowhere,leaves me drenched
After which the sun shines all bright again
drying away each and every tear
Thus overwhelmed by nature's own blessings
emerges from the shadows,a very new & resurgent 'me'...
:) :) :)
Peering through the window
I see 'you',waving goodbye
A pall of gloom descends as you disappear!
Life continues at the same pace even as
the heart stays bereft of emotions...
My mirror eyes me solemnly
And I tend to look away, still sad,
unwilling to accept the unwarranted lack of cheer!
Dreams are offering me company
while hope doesnt allow me any solitude...
Then this sudden downpour from nowhere,leaves me drenched
After which the sun shines all bright again
drying away each and every tear
Thus overwhelmed by nature's own blessings
emerges from the shadows,a very new & resurgent 'me'...
Friday, 20 June 2008
No poetry!!!
Well, I wished to express myself today but there are no words..the blank pages of my diary are staring hard at me and i am...clueless.
This has never happened before.
I can hear this feeble voice coming from somewhere deep inside me.
But I dont want to hear it.
The mind has now taken over and it says...'keep away from poetry' and I'm listening to it...
I'm feeling sad and hurt but everything else seems well...
Lets see how long the brain can rule.
This has never happened before.
I can hear this feeble voice coming from somewhere deep inside me.
But I dont want to hear it.
The mind has now taken over and it says...'keep away from poetry' and I'm listening to it...
I'm feeling sad and hurt but everything else seems well...
Lets see how long the brain can rule.
Tuesday, 10 June 2008
Thats all I could do...!!!
Forever inspiring, always listening
I wonder, if u cud hear my silence too
Blessed are those who get such friends
and grateful am I, to be having you!!
There were days when u did hurt me
and your bluntness was sharper than a knife
Then there were the times you stood by me
both in happiness & sorrow alike
Almost perfect, full of confidence
I believe, thats how everyone knows you
But there's this stubborn yet innocent kid
somewhere, visible only to a few
Nothing could be more pure
than the friendship that we share
Its a beautiful relationship
that has been nurtured with lots of care
Unforgettable are those petty fights
your ways of making me understand
Those unnecessary sorry's n thankyou's
that you constantly banned
I could go on and on
for this story's never gonna end
Yet I'll stop right here
coz I know the rest you'll comprehend!!!
I wonder, if u cud hear my silence too
Blessed are those who get such friends
and grateful am I, to be having you!!
There were days when u did hurt me
and your bluntness was sharper than a knife
Then there were the times you stood by me
both in happiness & sorrow alike
Almost perfect, full of confidence
I believe, thats how everyone knows you
But there's this stubborn yet innocent kid
somewhere, visible only to a few
Nothing could be more pure
than the friendship that we share
Its a beautiful relationship
that has been nurtured with lots of care
Unforgettable are those petty fights
your ways of making me understand
Those unnecessary sorry's n thankyou's
that you constantly banned
I could go on and on
for this story's never gonna end
Yet I'll stop right here
coz I know the rest you'll comprehend!!!
Sunday, 18 May 2008
Random...
As the days roll on
all the equations change
The lips bring on that smile
but the eyes fail to reciprocate
The sun no longer appears bright
and the rays of hope disappear too
Remembering those days of yore
today seems just so out of date
The winds dont ruffle the leaves
and the flowers fail to bloom
Those butterflies still hover around
as I wonder, is that worth the wait??
Thinking of it all,I fall asleep
and soon dreams overtake my thoughts
Thus the world is all beautiful again
for everything in it is so appropriate!!
all the equations change
The lips bring on that smile
but the eyes fail to reciprocate
The sun no longer appears bright
and the rays of hope disappear too
Remembering those days of yore
today seems just so out of date
The winds dont ruffle the leaves
and the flowers fail to bloom
Those butterflies still hover around
as I wonder, is that worth the wait??
Thinking of it all,I fall asleep
and soon dreams overtake my thoughts
Thus the world is all beautiful again
for everything in it is so appropriate!!
Wednesday, 23 April 2008
My stressbusters....
The other day we were talking when one of my friends just mentioned about smoking and drinking.He said tht they give a high or something like tht...one gets relieved of all stresses..makes u feel better and all that nonsense. Me calling it all nonsense bcoz i fail to understnd why people indulge in such ridiculous activities tht are more harmful then helpful.
Anyways it made me think abt my ways of coping with stress.And guess wht my list of stressbusters is quite long..it comprises of all those people who have made an impact on my life and those things tht stay with me always..Stressbusters isnt an appropriate word but then thinking abt them or talking to them does help me with overcoming my apprehensions!!!
Here goes:
1. Dearest mum - talking to her always makes me feel a lot better...she's the best mom in the whole world. With her being around i knw nothing's gonna go wrong.All my anxieties n fears are allayed just by her sheer presence...we r the best of frnds...she knws me inside out n can understnd my feelings without me even having to mention a word.
2. Daddy - well wht do i say abt him...its just tht i love him, he's my biggest strength just like mom...he does care abt me a lot bt u see men dont express everything na bt then i do understnd...i'm so proud to be his daughter...whnevr he's there i knw all my prblms will be solved n my indecisiveness wud cease.
3. Akshu - he's the apple of my eye.spending time with him is like being a kid again. i forget tht i'm grown up. Playing with him lets me be so happy...his world is so full of innocence, there are no worries, no tensions. he's one my cutest stress buster.
4. My grandparents - they have inspired me n helped me become a stronger n more determined person. Their blessings shall have always been with me...their comforting words allow me to forget my worries.
5. My friends - i'd mention them all - Richa, Shilpi, Jaya, Khushbu, Priyanka - they hear me out everytime...tolerate my mood swings and still dont seem to leave me alone. then there's Ayesha, Pinku, Pooja, Neha, Supriya- all of them knw me so well...i can share anything n everything with them. hw cud i forget Nitesh, Vivek, Akash, Dheer - always helping, understnding me n caring for me ...
6. My inspirations - Dr.Parag, Sujay, Vidhi ,Devesh. they are the ones who have inspired me into trying something new, to constantly improve, to stay modest, to overcome my weaknesses, to move ahead in life n to be me.I always look up to them...they motivate me in their own unique ways.
6. Chocolates, icecreams, my books, my poems - all my remaining tensions r relived thanks to these.they all r my best friends!!
7. The one and only, GOD - Actually he comes first always.Talking to Him is the best thing i can ever think of doing.There hasnt been a single moment in these 21 yrs of my existence tht he's left me alone. He exists in me and in everythng arnd...My constant advisor, my friend, philosopher n guide...
Well people i just wanted to mention tht I really love u all...u've helped Radhika becum Radhika....its such a pleasure to be a part of your life.I'm glad to have met u!!!!!:)
Anyways it made me think abt my ways of coping with stress.And guess wht my list of stressbusters is quite long..it comprises of all those people who have made an impact on my life and those things tht stay with me always..Stressbusters isnt an appropriate word but then thinking abt them or talking to them does help me with overcoming my apprehensions!!!
Here goes:
1. Dearest mum - talking to her always makes me feel a lot better...she's the best mom in the whole world. With her being around i knw nothing's gonna go wrong.All my anxieties n fears are allayed just by her sheer presence...we r the best of frnds...she knws me inside out n can understnd my feelings without me even having to mention a word.
2. Daddy - well wht do i say abt him...its just tht i love him, he's my biggest strength just like mom...he does care abt me a lot bt u see men dont express everything na bt then i do understnd...i'm so proud to be his daughter...whnevr he's there i knw all my prblms will be solved n my indecisiveness wud cease.
3. Akshu - he's the apple of my eye.spending time with him is like being a kid again. i forget tht i'm grown up. Playing with him lets me be so happy...his world is so full of innocence, there are no worries, no tensions. he's one my cutest stress buster.
4. My grandparents - they have inspired me n helped me become a stronger n more determined person. Their blessings shall have always been with me...their comforting words allow me to forget my worries.
5. My friends - i'd mention them all - Richa, Shilpi, Jaya, Khushbu, Priyanka - they hear me out everytime...tolerate my mood swings and still dont seem to leave me alone. then there's Ayesha, Pinku, Pooja, Neha, Supriya- all of them knw me so well...i can share anything n everything with them. hw cud i forget Nitesh, Vivek, Akash, Dheer - always helping, understnding me n caring for me ...
6. My inspirations - Dr.Parag, Sujay, Vidhi ,Devesh. they are the ones who have inspired me into trying something new, to constantly improve, to stay modest, to overcome my weaknesses, to move ahead in life n to be me.I always look up to them...they motivate me in their own unique ways.
6. Chocolates, icecreams, my books, my poems - all my remaining tensions r relived thanks to these.they all r my best friends!!
7. The one and only, GOD - Actually he comes first always.Talking to Him is the best thing i can ever think of doing.There hasnt been a single moment in these 21 yrs of my existence tht he's left me alone. He exists in me and in everythng arnd...My constant advisor, my friend, philosopher n guide...
Well people i just wanted to mention tht I really love u all...u've helped Radhika becum Radhika....its such a pleasure to be a part of your life.I'm glad to have met u!!!!!:)
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